I recently met with one of my friends and we were talking about this exact topic because there are times in every stage of life when somebody is questioning what we do. Whether it’s how we wear our hair to how we raise our children and even how we express our creativity.
Effective communication whether it’s with loved ones or complete strangers should be out of respect. Respect for why they do the things they do and don’t do and respect for privacy. Some questions should never even be asked like “When are you going to start a family?” This is not only a personal question it strikes a chord with some so deep because maybe they tried to have a baby and it’s not happening yet or maybe they are in the middle of a fertility treatment they don’t want to reveal and shouldn’t have to.
Relationships are another hot topic people like to dive into with a list of questions at their fingertips. “Have you started dating” or “When are you going to get engaged?” Perhaps that person isn’t ready to date yet because of a previous fall out in their life or for someone else getting engaged is not that simple due to family issues. But people pursue and keep asking more.
Raising children is probably the biggest one of all because since there are so many stages they go through, it’s difficult not to compare with other families. But here’s the thing. Books are a great guide they are not the Bible. Every child develops differently at different rates and as long as the Dr is happy with their progress and the family home is a happy one, that’s all that matters. Some children develop slower than others because of a health issue and when someone questions their progress by comparing it to a child without health issues, is that even fair?
When faced with these types of situations in our life we need to ask ourselves some questions first. Is this person genuinely interested in my life or are they just curious, or plain old nosy? What is the motivation behind their questioning? Are they trying to make small talk? Will I ever see this person again even though I’m sitting beside them on a plane for the next 5 hours? You do not need to divulge your personal life to anyone unless you feel comfortable doing so. There’s no need to answer that question if you feel they are just being curious. People who are genuinely interested in what you have to say are the ones who won’t judge you. They’re with you and in it for the long haul. Sure advice might be given but you can take it or leave it, in the end, it’s your decision anyway so don’t let it bother you.
As far as being creative, we all have it, we’re all artists in some way shape or form. Some of us just use it more than others and nobody’s perfect. There’s no need to start a rally to get people on your side. Enjoy what you do and love every minute of it.
If you feel like shaving your head or chopping your hair short then by all means go right ahead. It’s time for people to put the judgmental magnifying lens down and start trusting people that they have the ability to make good decisions on their own. Just because they aren’t doing things the way you are doesn’t mean it’s wrong.
And if you don’t believe me, are you genuinely interested or just curious?
Much Love ❤