Go With The Flow

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Have you ever tried to control a situation where you don’t have any control?  Did it feel good?  Did you succeed?  What I’ve learned is the harder I try to control a situation like this, the more exhausted I feel and I lose in more ways than one.  People tend to say “go with the flow” but what does that really mean?

I’m writing this blog on the shoreline of my favorite beach.

I’m watching the whitecap waves ascending and descending, just like my emotions on my tough days or tough moments that still appear out of nowhere.

My hot tears hit the hot sand and I realize they are made of water that also flows, sometimes uncontrollably.  I’m grateful I’m wearing sunglasses.

Water has become a very significant symbol in my life that represents emotion, flow, life, surrendering and letting go.  It’s about being in the moment, following the pull, not the push.

Imagine you are standing in a river and walking against the current.  Water is pushing you around, and you are forcing the water in return.  You realize you are resisting and walking in the wrong direction which is difficult. Everything feels heavy.

Now imagine turning around, where one small shift changes everything.  The river current is pulling you in the right direction, you are no longer fighting it and you are even letting go while being in the moment.  It carries you and you are going with the flow.  The current catches you, and you feel so much lighter and relaxed.

Does this mean you are a prisoner to the water and have no choice as to where you are going?

Not at all.

You can turn left, right, go straight or even take a break if you want to.  Just keep going in the right direction and let go a little bit so the current can carry you and have some fun with it.  Look down and see how clear that water is?  What else do you see and notice?  How does it feel to be so free?

Recently, I realized I need to go with the flow more in certain areas of my life.  Lower my expectations, don’t try to control the outcome, live in the moment and enjoy it.  One of my close friends Judith who is a life coach and a great one I might add, asked me if there was ever a time where I did something big in my life, was vulnerable, felt like I was going with the flow, didn’t attach an outcome to it and did it anyway?  Guess what I answered….”Yes, when I wrote my book.  I had no idea how it would turn out, I just did it, enjoyed the process and hoped people would like it.”

Bingo.

It’s the same in other areas of life where it’s important to trust in the process, go with the flow, and believe things will work out the way they are supposed to.  Stop fighting it and embrace it instead.  I admit I get my hopes up very high, very fast and trying to bring myself down to a low starting level is very hard.  But what’s even harder is living with constant disappointment that things didn’t go the way I expected them to.  Especially when it comes to relationships.

That’s where the waves come into play.  The highs and lows are so unpredictable and can carry you away into good and not so good times; just like love, emotions, and life.  Rather than crashing into the waves, ride them instead, it’s okay. It’s unrealistic to think you need to be happy all the time so when sadness or anger comes along, think of it as a wave and ride it out because it will pass and flatten out eventually.

As I sit here and look out at the turquoise water and watch these waves, I somehow feel at peace because of their sound washing against the shore, and how great they look rolling in, while the birds sing overhead. I see my kids playing in these waves, having a great time, going with the flow.  I now realize we are all connected to nature, and many of life’s answers are out there if we pay attention to them.

I am happy to say I’ve been making some progress in going with the flow and I still have work to do, but it feels much better, very freeing, and less stressful.  Dare I say…Fun??

Sometimes, yes.  I’m still learning.

How do you go with the flow?

 

Much Love ❤

Jen

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P.S:  I would like to thank you ALL for your support and love through the promotion of my book which is going very well.  For those who have read it and even took the time to review it, I am honored and so grateful.  On Saturday, September 9th, from Noon to 4 pm, I will be doing another book signing at Chapters Gloucester in the Ottawa area.  If you would like to stop by, say hi, and pick up a signed copy of “Winning While Losing:  The Upside of Heartbreak” it would be great to see you!

Copies and different versions are available on all online bookstores worldwide.

Thank you all again, and dare to live courageously…

XOXO

This Is India 2017-Part Four

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February 14-17th, 2017

I took an Ola cab from Pune to Mumbai on the 13th and cabs in India are not expensive.  I was able to ride 3 hours for about $40.00 Canadian.  In comparison, for me to go 40 minutes to the Ottawa airport from my house, it costs me about $60.00 Canadian.  I don’t even want to think about how much 3 hours would cost here, I’m getting heart palpitations already! 😛 Then I realized, hey, This Is India!

I met my friend Vineet again because the next day we were heading to Alleppey by train and he was able to have the time to visit some places with me which made it fun not to be on my own all the time.  On the 14th, we boarded the train and the trip was going to take roughly 20 hours to get there.  Trains in India are not the same as here.  They run slower because of the tracks so it takes longer to get there which is ok because there’s more time to look at the scenery and talk.  Your seat also becomes your bed so every cabin has bunk beds along with sheets, blankets, and pillows.  I liked this idea because I could stretch out my legs the entire trip and not be sitting the whole way.  I slept like a baby and workers on the train came around to serve food, chai, and coffee.  It was a really great time to experience train travel there.  Alleppey is located in Kerala which is more tropical than Mumbai so as we got closer, the vegetation changed and so did the temperature which I loved.  Temperatures were at +40 C each day!  That’s better than -40 C here in February!

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Prior to leaving Canada, I spoke with another friend of mine, Srinath who connected me with his friend Soni who connected me with his friend Binu in Alleppey because Binu owns a houseboat there.  And when you go to Alleppey, you have to try a houseboat ride on the backwaters of Kerala.  When you board the boat, you are not the only ones out on the water.  Numerous houseboats are out at the same time each day showing tourists the beauty of Kerala.  The houseboat ride was roughly 6 hours long and lunch and snacks were included.  The food was incredible and we docked at lunchtime to eat.  Binu was very good at taking great care of us, picking us up and touring around the town.  Many thanks to everyone for arranging this day in advance for us.

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Alleppey is a nice place that’s not too big, it’s on the Arabian Sea and the water is so warm and clear.  The hotel was located right across the street from the beach and it had great views from the restaurant and also very good food.  The sunset was amazing and we were lucky to see one on time, so many people were on the beach at that time compared to during the day.

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I bought some famous banana chips and managed to bring some home for the kids.  I think I liked them more than they did, I’ve never had such great banana chips!  This Is India!  🙂

It was great to see the southern part of India and have good company along the way.  Thanks for joining me Vineet, I had a great time traveling with you! 😀

On Friday the 17th we went our separate ways because I was flying to Bangalore to see more blogging friends for the weekend!  😉 ❤ Stay tuned for more fun and excitement…

 

Much Love ❤

Jen

 

 

 

Finding the Fun Factor

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I’m so happy 2015 is coming to an end.  This year has been an emotional roller coaster ride in more ways than one and through it all, I had to find ways of having fun in order to cope with it like writing, Zumba and Yoga just to name a few.   Things got better as 2015 rolled on and now I’m ending it on a high note.  Yay!  🙂

Out of all the aspects in our lives, fun is often the one thing that’s put on the back burner for some reason.  Things like work, sports, education, family, friends, health and even spirituality are taken so seriously to the point where fun has no entry point.  Now where’s the fun in that?  There’s always room for fun and taking things a little lighter.  Life can be hard and heavy sometimes which only adds more stress to it all.

This Christmas I am challenging myself and all of you to find your fun factor.  What thrills you?  If you have snow where you are, build a fort and get a snowball fight going just like Buddy the Elf in this image!  If you are in a warm climate (lucky you…) then head to the beach and jump in the waves like a dolphin!   Whatever it is that you love doing for fun, do it as much as possible during the holidays.  Then try to see your difficult situation through a humorous lens instead of a serious one and see how much lighter you feel with a new perspective on it.  If you can laugh at it….you got it.  It no longer has you.

Dare to be different.

This January I am going to India to see some of my amazing blogging friends and I can’t wait to get there!  Seeing everyone will be so much fun and it will open my world to a whole new culture and perspective which will be inspiring and life changing.  Doesn’t this sound like fun?!  Looks like 2016 will be starting off in a really fun way.

The main message I would like to send is this; you all have the power within you to solve any problem you have.  It’s not your first rodeo dealing with problems.  You got through the last one so what tools did you use to make it through to the other side?  These same tools can be used again in your current situation but maybe in a different way now.  You just need to have an open mind and an open heart to stay solution focused and not problem focused.  Have some fun with it.

If you can see light in your darkness, love in your fear, the heaven in your hell, the silver lining in your cloud then you are off to the races my friends.  This is the perspective you need to focus on in order to move forward with any situation because what you focus your attention on, you get more of it.  Therefore, let your focus always be positive while dealing with the negative.  All the messy dirty work is happening in the negative but you need balance while doing that and that’s where a positive focus comes in.

I would like to thank everyone who is following me, liking my stuff, commenting and encouraging me, you guys are so amazing and because of you I get inspired!  I wish you all a very Merry Christmas and a bright Happy New Year for 2016.  And remember, we’re all in this together, we’re connected and on the same journey which is to find love, peace and happiness in life.  Let’s keep supporting one another and in the meantime, get out there and find your fun factor!

Keep smiling and keep writing!  🙂

Life is good…

Big Hugs and Love,

Jen
xoxoxo