These Times They Are A Changin’

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Some of the major benefits of living in Canada are the changes in season.  Like many fellow Canadians, the weather is on our minds 24/7 and we talk about it any chance we can get, like standing in the elevator with strangers, talking to our neighbors, or even at the grocery checkout while stocking up on pop and Doritos.

What I have come to realize is that our spiritual connection to Mother Nature is linked to many of life’s answers right in our own backyard.  The four seasons in Canada are different but temporary, just like our emotions or life situations.  They happen whether we want them to or not and every year they can seem easier or more difficult, it depends on your perspective.  How we react to them is what counts.  Even the cold or rainy season eventually comes to an end and that’s when warm sunny days are here again.  The opposite is also true.

Nothing lasts forever; everything is temporary.

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You would think that with all this change and adjustment to change, we would be pretty darn good at it by now, but are we?  Why is it that we resist change so much when it could be viewed as something beautiful with many possibilities and opportunities instead?  Fear of the unknown is very controlling and can make our imagination run wild with unrealistic thoughts and beliefs that we end up standing in our own way.  Even worse if we make decisions based on imaginary thoughts without the facts, that’s just careless.

We create our own roadblocks.

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I for one, am not a fan of winter and every October when I see the beautiful colored maple leaves falling from the trees, I know the snow is right around the corner in November and can last for 6 months onward.  Instead of complaining about it, I need to see the opportunities it can bring like going cross-country skiing, snowshoeing or sipping something interesting beside a warm cozy fire.  Winter in itself is another spiritual connection because, after a difficult snowstorm, things look beautiful again because change has taken place.  It’s another reminder for me to go with the flow…in the snow.

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Being grateful for what I have has changed my perspective on life quite a bit.  Even though I lost so much through a divorce, I believe it has made me a better person in the end because I took my own responsibilities and made the necessary changes that were in dire need to be changed, for me and my kids.  This is not an easy process nor am I finished with it yet but I am focusing my attention on what I have so I can have more of it.  I am liking this changing game because I’m growing and learning more about myself.

There’s no point in resisting change because let’s face it, no matter what, these times they are a-changin’

Much Love and Happy Thanksgiving,

Jen ❤

**All photos are my own taken in the Ottawa/Gatineau region of Canada.

PS:  Thank you to everyone for all your support with my book Winning While Losing:  The Upside of Heartbreak.  Things are going very well!   I really enjoyed the book launch, book signings, interaction with people and their book reviews!  If you are interested in leaving a review, please feel free to comment here or send me an email at jgreenwinningwhilelosing@gmail.com

I will add it to my website or you can also write a review at Goodreads or the online bookstore where you purchased it.  Copies are available at all online bookstores worldwide.

If you missed the TV episode of my interview on How To Heal From Divorce, you can watch it on the Facebook page Rogers tv Ottawa, Cable 22.  We are a group of women discussing healing and coping techniques so people don’t feel so alone.

All my gratitude to you,

Dare to live courageously…

 

 

 

Go With The Flow

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Have you ever tried to control a situation where you don’t have any control?  Did it feel good?  Did you succeed?  What I’ve learned is the harder I try to control a situation like this, the more exhausted I feel and I lose in more ways than one.  People tend to say “go with the flow” but what does that really mean?

I’m writing this blog on the shoreline of my favorite beach.

I’m watching the whitecap waves ascending and descending, just like my emotions on my tough days or tough moments that still appear out of nowhere.

My hot tears hit the hot sand and I realize they are made of water that also flows, sometimes uncontrollably.  I’m grateful I’m wearing sunglasses.

Water has become a very significant symbol in my life that represents emotion, flow, life, surrendering and letting go.  It’s about being in the moment, following the pull, not the push.

Imagine you are standing in a river and walking against the current.  Water is pushing you around, and you are forcing the water in return.  You realize you are resisting and walking in the wrong direction which is difficult. Everything feels heavy.

Now imagine turning around, where one small shift changes everything.  The river current is pulling you in the right direction, you are no longer fighting it and you are even letting go while being in the moment.  It carries you and you are going with the flow.  The current catches you, and you feel so much lighter and relaxed.

Does this mean you are a prisoner to the water and have no choice as to where you are going?

Not at all.

You can turn left, right, go straight or even take a break if you want to.  Just keep going in the right direction and let go a little bit so the current can carry you and have some fun with it.  Look down and see how clear that water is?  What else do you see and notice?  How does it feel to be so free?

Recently, I realized I need to go with the flow more in certain areas of my life.  Lower my expectations, don’t try to control the outcome, live in the moment and enjoy it.  One of my close friends Judith who is a life coach and a great one I might add, asked me if there was ever a time where I did something big in my life, was vulnerable, felt like I was going with the flow, didn’t attach an outcome to it and did it anyway?  Guess what I answered….”Yes, when I wrote my book.  I had no idea how it would turn out, I just did it, enjoyed the process and hoped people would like it.”

Bingo.

It’s the same in other areas of life where it’s important to trust in the process, go with the flow, and believe things will work out the way they are supposed to.  Stop fighting it and embrace it instead.  I admit I get my hopes up very high, very fast and trying to bring myself down to a low starting level is very hard.  But what’s even harder is living with constant disappointment that things didn’t go the way I expected them to.  Especially when it comes to relationships.

That’s where the waves come into play.  The highs and lows are so unpredictable and can carry you away into good and not so good times; just like love, emotions, and life.  Rather than crashing into the waves, ride them instead, it’s okay. It’s unrealistic to think you need to be happy all the time so when sadness or anger comes along, think of it as a wave and ride it out because it will pass and flatten out eventually.

As I sit here and look out at the turquoise water and watch these waves, I somehow feel at peace because of their sound washing against the shore, and how great they look rolling in, while the birds sing overhead. I see my kids playing in these waves, having a great time, going with the flow.  I now realize we are all connected to nature, and many of life’s answers are out there if we pay attention to them.

I am happy to say I’ve been making some progress in going with the flow and I still have work to do, but it feels much better, very freeing, and less stressful.  Dare I say…Fun??

Sometimes, yes.  I’m still learning.

How do you go with the flow?

 

Much Love ❤

Jen

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P.S:  I would like to thank you ALL for your support and love through the promotion of my book which is going very well.  For those who have read it and even took the time to review it, I am honored and so grateful.  On Saturday, September 9th, from Noon to 4 pm, I will be doing another book signing at Chapters Gloucester in the Ottawa area.  If you would like to stop by, say hi, and pick up a signed copy of “Winning While Losing:  The Upside of Heartbreak” it would be great to see you!

Copies and different versions are available on all online bookstores worldwide.

Thank you all again, and dare to live courageously…

XOXO